Month: April 2014

Categories
Relationships

Things We Get Wrong, Part 3… Inviting People To Church

When I started out in youth ministry, I had the idea that I should invite any and every teenager who I could find to come check out our youth worship services. So I did. And some of them even came. And some of them had not grown up in church. And some of them were a bit rough around the edges.

Therefore, I was quickly taken aside and told by a couple of the members of the church, “Be careful what teenagers you invite into this church, because some don’t know how to behave in church, and they don’t need to be here until they learn how to behave.”

WHAT??

sign stating "wrong way, go back" to signify things we get wrong

Were they serious?
Unfortunately, yes.
And as a young minister who was about 25 years younger than them, I didn’t know what to say. (Though I’d have some choice words for such a comment said to me today!)

“They don’t know how to behave.”
“They shouldn’t be allowed here until they can behave.”
So who is supposed to teach them how to behave in church if not the church?

Of course, I disagree with the whole “in church” mentality anyway. People are the church, not the building at a certain address that you find yourself “in” on a given Sunday. But apart from that technicality, when we have these types of attitudes, we have gone back to the system of the Pharisees that says: “You clean up your act, and then you can come to know God.”

Instead we should be living in the system of Christ that says, “You come as you are – with your sin – and let Jesus embrace you and remove your sin – then He will help to clean you up.”

Which attitude draws people?
Which attitude is compassionate?
Which attitude shows love?

Jesus drew people to Himself, was compassionate, was loving… even to the outcast and the sinner. How is it that Christians are so often seen as people who push people away and are not known for compassion or love? How do we get this so wrong?

We are told to imitate Jesus. So what does that mean? It means we should be people of grace, forgiveness, and joy so that we help to show what Jesus is like – the One who loves deeply and constantly pursues us to transform us into His likeness.

I’m glad I didn’t fall into the trap that these two people set for me, and instead kept on inviting new teens – even the ones who didn’t yet know how to behave! I guess I’m still learning how to “behave” as well! And that is fine by me.

Now go out and invite someone to be part of your faith community.

Don’t invite them “into” a church building. Invite them into church – into the relationship of family that it is.

And don’t worry about whether they know how to behave. When Jesus gets hold of them, He’ll take care of cleaning them up the way He wants them to be. You and me… we’d just mess it up!

Categories
Relationships

Things We Get Wrong, part 2… Children.

Wrong Thing #2. “Children are Annoying.”

rusty children playing sign to symbolize how we get things wrong with our childrenSure, some of you might be thinking: “That statement is neither wrong nor a myth…I see plenty of annoying kids throughout the week. Sometimes they are even my own.”

Okay. Point taken. As a youth and children’s minister for more than 12 years, I saw some children who were annoying, but that was usually because we adults had made some pretty dumb mistakes in modeling right behavior for them. Which might mean that we adults are pretty annoying and have shown our children how to do it well. Anyway…

What I actually mean to say about children being annoying is that we often get annoyed by children for the wrong things. Specifically, I am thinking about church. And this isn’t a new problem. Even the disciples thought that interacting with children was “beneath” Jesus, who obviously was so important that He didn’t have time to spend with bratty kids. Of course, Jesus straightened the disciples out on that issue quickly!

And so we come to church, and we find ourselves getting frustrated with small ones in our church services, ending up with an attitude very similar to the disciples.

Parents bring their child to church, and the child turns a bit fussy in the worship service. So we have these infants and toddlers in service… the ones who might cry during a prayer or talk a bit loud such that we can’t hear all that the preacher is saying or they are squirmy and distracting. And so we get a bit annoyed.

At the very same time, those same parents are worrying and fretting over the fact that their child is disrupting the service in some way. They are trying all the tricks in their “parenting bag” to get them to stop. At that point, some of these parents wonder why they even came to church that day. They are so very apologetic to others around them. Often they even come and apologize to me after service, thinking that I must have been distracted or frustrated with them.

But the truth is that if we stop and think about what it means – that these parents have thought that church is so important that they have gotten up early, struggled through waking up their children, getting them fed, getting them dressed, having to change them into another outfit because the first one just got messed up with milk and cereal, now packing them all in the car, and then bringing them to church where they can hear about God…

These parents are so serious about getting their children to a place where they can learn about Jesus. When we realize this, then we should celebrate the fact that we hear crying in our sanctuary, we should pride ourselves on the fact that our church has committed parents, we should be filled with joy that we get to see a new generation for Christ being raised in front of our eyes.

So, thank you parents for bringing your fussy children to church. They are not annoying. They are a great reminder to us that God is at work in your life and you want Him at work in their precious lives!

We can get things wrong and be just like the disciples if we don’t think deeply about what is taking place in our own sanctuary and church. And parents, also know that when your child is being a distraction, it is usually because the children’s minister is making faces at them and just having an overall great time antagonizing them from two rows back. I know I always enjoyed doing so! (just ask Gail Carr, Angela Gill, or Trent & Shannon Favre!)

In fact, I still get a few occasions to do so as a pastor! (just ask the Russell’s, Liggett’s, James’, McGee’s, Thomas’, Wagner’s, etc. ect.!)

Keep bringing your children to church. If you don’t, I’ll get annoyed.

Categories
Christian Living

Things We Get Wrong, part 1.

#1. God Cannot Look On Sin
You’ve probably heard that statement before.
Maybe you’ve even said it yourself.
But is it accurate?

man hiding his face symbolizing God not looking on sin - something we get wrong

Let me ask it another way…

Can God save sinners?
Of course He can. Certainly So.
This is one of the key beliefs of Christians. A key teaching of the church.

But… how could that be possible if our opening statement is true? How can God save sinners if He can’t look on sin? or if He can’t hear the prayer of a sinner? How could He save a sinful person if He must turn His back on them until they are righteous?
Hmmm… maybe this statement is one we’ve gotten a bit wrong.

Now it is true that God will not allow sin into His eternal, heavenly kingdom. But sin in our lives does not necessitate that God turns His back on us. Instead, it means that we have broken our fellowship with Him, not our relationship.

As a parent, when your child does something “wrong” by deliberately disobeying you does it damage your fellowship with the child? Yes. But does it break your relationship – such that you are no longer the child’s parent until he/she comes and apologizes? Do you turn your back on them until they confess their wrongdoing? Of course not. It doesn’t break your relationship… you are still his/her Mom or Dad. Your child is still a beloved son/daughter. It is the same with God. When we are rebellious, it damages our fellowship, but it doesn’t change our relationship. He is still the loving father who doesn’t turn His back on us. Rather He reaches out to us.

Many of us have heard that the moment when Jesus took all the sins of the world and became our sin, God the Father turned His back on Jesus, God the Son. It is true that at that moment, God could not retain full fellowship with Jesus, who became sin. But He did not turn His back on Jesus… In fact, Psalm 22 – a prophetic psalm of the crucifixion of the Messiah, indicates that God did not reject Jesus nor did He hide His face from Jesus. Jesus willingly took on our sin and so willingly felt what it was like to be without the intimate fellowship of God the Father.

But let us be careful that we don’t say things that let others think that God might turn His back on them.

What a terrible thought! …That God might turn His back on me.

From the very first sin that happened in the Garden of Eden, we find that God doesn’t hide Himself from sinners. Instead He pursues them. He is the One who pursued Adam & Eve who were hiding after their sin. Had God not pursued those two sinners, it is unlikely they would have interacted with Him again. So even in the midst of my willful sin, God pursues me and calls me to return to Him. He pursues me to restore fellowship with me.

God is holy.
God will not let sin into His eternal kingdom.
Therefore He gives us Jesus to provide us with righteousness to cover our unrighteousness. While we were still sinners, God looked upon us with love and sent Jesus to show us the full measure of His love for us in sin.

God’s mercy is huge. God’s grace is unfathomable.
His righteousness is big enough to cover our sin.
But let’s strive to hate our sin like God hates it.

“God started the sacrificial system for at least two reasons. First, He desired His people to loathe sin. With the constant stream of bloody sacrifices offered by the priests, people were confronted continually with the seriousness of His holiness and their sin. Every time they sinned, something had to die. Second, the sacrificial system was intended to help people long for a Savior whose sacrifice would be complete and perfect. The system was elaborate, but it was never intended to be sufficient; instead, it pointed to something much deeper. It was designed to be a tutor to teach people they could never fulfill the law.” (Matt Chandler, ‘Creature of the Word’)

On this, the week we remember the cross and the empty tomb, let’s thank Jesus for fulfilling the law for us… for becoming that perfect and complete sacrifice. And let’s thank Him for looking on our sin, hating it, and doing something amazing about it.

Categories
Relationships

Safe, Not Soft.

a soft cottony dandelion seed headPreviously I wrote about how Jesus wasn’t safe. (But that He is good!)

And while it may be true that Jesus is not safe, the church does need to be a “safe” place for people to come with their brokenness.

Too often, though, we think that being a safe place means we have to be “soft.”

No so. Jesus certainly wasn’t.

Jesus loved people furiously, without ever being soft on their sin. We have to love people furiously as well, at the same time holding a serious view of behavior that is not God-honoring.

“Abhor what is evil.” A gospel-centered community acknowledges the presence of sin and welcomes the confession of sin. But a truly gospel-centered community never reduces the severity of sin. …When God saves us, our attitude toward sin changes. Sin doesn’t become easier to commit; it becomes more despicable to us than ever. …Abhorring what is evil in the context of community requires true love–love that dares to inflict “the wounds of a friend” (Prov. 27:6).

The weakest, saddest, most hypocritical form of pseudo-love is the kind that sees someone in danger and simply hopes everything works out in the end. Is it judgmental, ruthless, or wicked to correct your children when they’re doing things that are dangerous for them? Normal parents would never watch their kids play in the street and just hope they don’t get hurt: “I know it’s dangerous, but look how happy they are. They seem to be having so much fun.” Our ferocious commitment to their safety and success, along with a heart full of genuine love, drives us to endure the often unhappy experience of disciplining our children.

In the same way, gospel-formed believers take responsibility for confronting those who claim to be Christ-followers and yet continue to sin. Church leaders must strive to create environments that are “safe but not soft”… environments that embrace people in their brokenness while guiding them to wholeness in Christ. [from ‘Creature of the Word’]

Let us reject pseudo-love in all our relationships.
Let us not be cruel by withholding the truth just to protect feelings.
Let us be safe, but not soft.

Categories
Christian Living

Jesus Is Not Safe.

artwork of aslan movie poster - the not safe lionFor a birthday gift last year, Paige “commissioned” an artist to paint a lion along with one of my favorite quotes from ‘The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.’ It is found in the discussion when the children are asking about Aslan, the Christ-figure in the story:

“Is he a man?” asked Lucy.

“Aslan a man!” said Mr. Beaver sternly. Certainly not. I tell you he is King of the wood and the son of the great Emperor-beyond-the-sea. Don’t you know who is the King of the Beasts? Aslan is a lion – The Lion, the great lion.”

“Oh!” said Susan, “I’d thought he was a man. Is he – quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion.”

“That you will, dearie, and no mistake” said Mrs. Beaver; “if there’s anyone who can appear before Aslan without their knees knocking, they’re either braver than most or else just silly.”

“Then he isn’t safe?” said Lucy.

“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver; “don’t you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”

Aren’t you listening? He’s a Lion! Of Course He Isn’t Safe!
But He’s Good.
What a remarkable description.

Jesus is not safe.
Choosing Him will cost you your life!

C.S.Lewis discovered this in his own life when he wrestled with Jesus over belief.
He discovered that Jesus was not safe. It cost Lewis his life.
All of a sudden his mind was filled with wanting to discover more about Jesus and write about Him and talk about Him. His life was consumed with this unsafe King.

But Lewis also discovered something else remarkable about Jesus along his journey.
That Jesus is Good.

He may not be safe, but He is the only One who can control your life without destroying it.
Not even you can do that.
What a Great King!

Jesus is not safe… But He is good.
And He is worth it.
You can trust this Unsafe King with your life.